Moving on to Eigth Grade

       
       Now that Onnaka is moving onto eighth grade she seems to be excited and nervous. She is learning not to let her anxiety get the best of her.  She has some mixed emotions about advancing on in middle school. She has become comfortable where she was at. But she is eager to see find out what is in store for her next year. She has definitely grown in the past year. Onnaka has taken some advice that I have taught her on how to deal with her anxiousness. Everyday I see she tries to let her guard down a little at a time. I know every teenager has their moments and middle school isn't easy. Onnaka also has realized that she is one year full year from being a freshmen in high school. When I look at her I see the little baby I brought home from the hospital. I can't believe how time has flown along with how much we have gone through to get her to this point. I personally never that any school would have given her a chance especially when she was in elementary school. She has went from this quiet little girl to a young lady that is talking in school now. She has made some vast improvements in the last few years. 
      She has had her share of disagreements with her friends. She has learned how to speak up for herself when needed with classmates. Onnaka also has become more relaxed to where she can be silly in front of people without worrying about what other people think of her. Onnaka is starting to show the world who Onnaka really is. All that going back and forth with psychiatrists and medications she has been on along with all the fighting for her rights at school has been well worth it. No one ever believed she was able to talk, play, read, and interact with other kids her age. I never thought that teachers would ever get to see it for themselves. Onnaka has really overcome her Selective Mutism in bigger strides than I could have ever imagined. I am excited for Onnaka and can't wait to see what this year brings her. To prove some teachers wrong and show them that yes Onnaka can do things she is suppose to, this is the best feeling in the world. I don't know how many times I wanted to fight with teachers and school staff over Onnaka. You never realize how much you would do for your child until you have kids. It has really been a roller coaster of emotions but well worth it.

Life with Anxiety in Junior High

      Now that Onnaka is in settled in junior high she has definitely grown to a smart young lady. But with that comes the usual stuff being in middle school. Worried about what she is going to wear verses what she won't wear. Those are big decisions already but with her it's 10 times worse. She has so many cute clothes but she always choses clothes that are a little bigger on her. When she choses to wear her cute clothes she wears a coat and zips it all the way up even if its 80 degrees outside. I try on a regular basis to asure her that it's ok to wear things that fit. She panics often so i back off. Then there is the homework issue. I never see majority of her homework. When i ask her about it she states it done. I never see graded papers I always hear that she doesn't have those papers. I wonder if she is worried about bad grades or worried about what I would say. I am hard on all my girls about school work. But with Onnaka it's a totally different way of dealing with her. I never hear about any type of dances or social gatherings from Onnaka. I believe she is afraid to try to branch out as a 13 year old girl makes her nervous. She can't even stand to be left at the house for more than 20 minutes by herself. She goes into an anxiety fit. Dealing with her anxiety when she was younger was easier. Now that she is a teeanger it definitely more of a challenge. 
      
      When you have the typical teenager fits and tears. Times that by 10 dealing with Onnaka's fits.
I have to teach her on a regular basis that she needs to walk away from situations when she gets frustrated. Otherwise she says things to hurt everyone's feelings. And then she feels worse in the end. She has a habit of picking on what everyone is doing like a normal teenager. It seems like she does it every chance she gets. Trying to teach a teenager how to leave things alone sometimes is difficult at times. I am always so worried about pushing Onnaka to far sometimes. I worry about what she could say or how she would react. 

      Raising teenagers it hard now a days. But when you have a child with any type of anxiety, panic attacks, and depression throws more challenges in your way. Try to tread lightly but not too light. Learn to talk with them and come up with a way to help them deal with their feelings. Remember when its a struggle for you, try to image the struggle that goes on with them.