The Divorce

      On top of helping Onnaka with her issues. I had issues going on at home. My marriage was falling apart and had been for years. But we couldn't run from it anymore. I filed for divorce and was more worried about how Onnaka was going to deal with it. Would she shut down even more or would she notice that I wasn't happy and it was for the best. I was very careful with how I handled the issue around Onnaka. As time went on, I noticed Onnaka and one of her sisters acting out alot. I was so worried about Onnaka shutting down we had made the decision for her and her sister to live with her dad. That lasted a few months before they were back with me. But this time I had transferred my job to a different city and moved. I was so worried about Onnaka making this last move. It's never easy for anyone that has anxiety to make big changes. Let alone a kid that is faced with such a big move. But Onnaka was a trooper she embraced the move as much as she could. I got her and her sisters settled into a school and waited to see what would transpire. Onnaka decided she wanted to be in band and all of a sudden she started talking in school. I couldn't believe it. I was in denial this was happening. Until one day there was an open house of some sort and my boyfriend had went to this. He had told me that the teachers stated she was talking and participating in class. And she had friends she was speaking to. I was in disbelief. I sat down with Onnaka and asked what was so different? She had told me that she was more comfortable and it was easier. I cried. All those years I faught for her to get the right help. Or just to get people to understand her. It took a totally different school in a totally different city to get her to her own comfort zone. 
       Now the challenge is dealing with her anxiety at a teenage stage. This is the most challenging by far. She is very insecure of herself. And always worrying about what people might say about her. I know this is typical with all teenagers but when they suffer with anxiety its 10 times worse. It's scary for me to watch her struggle with anger or just wanting to teach her coping mechanisms with her anxiety. People with anxiety their emotions are like a roller coaster and its not an easy thing to deal with. But I'm up for the challenge. I too suffer from anxiety and I try to teach Onnaka things that I have learned through the years. When you try to teach a teenager something reagardless they are right no matter what. I always have this fear that when she gets older she will turn to the wrong things in life to cope with her anxiety. So I try my best to teach her the right coping skills so that way she will never have to turn to anything else.